The Mountain

Why, oh why is it that the harder I strive to be good, and to do good, do I manage to totally mess up?  I feel like I’ve been steadily climbing a mountain, and when I almost make it to a place where I can take a rest, a small pebble, loosened through time moves under my foot.  As my foot begins to slide, more dirt and rock is loosened and I am now panicked, throwing my arms out before me to break my fall.  I slide down, scraping my holy knees, breaking the skin on my hands, feeling the pain in my hip as I gain momentum and crash into a bigger rock and slide over it on my soft belly.

My clothes are dirty and torn, and stained with blood.  All my labor lost, I am back down on the valley floor, where I began.  All my progress halted, gone, because I didn’t watch were I was going!  So sure of myself, how well I was getting along, I never even noticed that loose place on my path! 

I’m exhausted now, and I cry tears of frustration because I have to start all over again!  What drives me to do this?  I keep doing the same thing!  I seem to get a little bit further up that craggy hill and then something will distract me or I just forget to focus and down I come crashing!

I’m hungry, but my lunch pail is up on the place where I started to fall.  I have to climb back up there to retrieve it, to eat, to be filled with the wonderful taste of sustainment.  I know I can’t tarry for long, no matter how much my bruised and battered body, my torn flesh, tells me to just “give it up, there’s got to be an easier way!”  A part of me wishes I could, but a deeper and more wise part of me says, “No, you must claim this mountain before nightfall.  Relief will come at the summit.”

So I pick myself up, brush the dirt out of my torn scabs and once again begin my journey to the light; to my food, to safety and rest.  There, at the top is my reward.  And this time I know where another danger zone exists.  I will hopefully conquer this mountain this next trip!

Authors Note:  This is what happens not only when we don’t stay focused on God and His Word, but also when we start to feel just a little too comfortable in ‘our’ achievements.  He will lovingly pull us off that high mountain of self-esteem that we’re perched on, and remind us who is in charge, and allow us to conquer our own flesh.

dft ©