Some time ago on my way to work I was listening to Joyce Meyer's Deliverance from the Bondage of Fear. She was speaking about how we should not give in to fear or let it hold us in bondage, and that we must do as Jesus says, and 'fear not.'
She said fear will come upon us, but we mustn't let it control us. That was when God placed the following on my heart.
When children are little and learning how to ride a bicycle, they are afraid because they don't think they can do it. They're afraid they'll fall and hurt themselves. Think of how hard it is for a novice (first timer) to control the handlebars - they are all over the place!
But their Dads grab hold of the handlebar and the seat and steady the bike and walk beside them. They are still afraid, but begin to place more thought on what they are doing. There is more of a sense of security when Dad is walking, then running beside them. They follow instructions - "Just pedal! Go straight!"
They are afraid of falling down, but then Dad says, "You won't fall, I'll catch you! I promise!" Dad runs alongside and gently lets go of the handlebar, encouraging them, "See? You can do it!" The child becomes more sure of themselves. Dad says, "Don't worry, you won't fall, I'll catch you!"
The child doesn't even notice when Dad lets go. They are so busy riding and concentrating and enjoying their new power they actually forget to be afraid. They are focused. Daddy said he would catch them. There is no reason to fear, they trust their Dad.
That's how we are to be with God. We are to be 'as little children.' Turn our fears over to Him, He won't let us fall. Ask Him to steady us, hold on to our handlebars and seat until we're more secure.
Don't worry! He won't let us fall, He'll catch us! Afterall, He is our Father, Abba Daddy.
"For He Himself has said, "I will never leave you nor forsake you." Hebrews 13:5 NKJ
Showing posts with label Trust. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Trust. Show all posts
Wednesday, April 4, 2012
Friday, January 13, 2012
Coming Back
We have all been there, stunned that things aren't exactly what we thought. Everything seemed to be alright and then the world came crashing down around us. Someone we love left.
They had to have had a reason to leave or they wouldn't have in the first place. Now the question comes, "What could I have done differently?" but all the reasoning in the world doesn't change things. They left. You are alone and lonely and so sorry for all the things you didn't know you could have fixed. You would do anything at all for that one you so desperately love. You want to say 'Please come back!' but you are afraid they will say no. You want to say, "I will do anything you ask, I'm different now, I have finally found my way, I'm sorry that I made you leave." But you are afraid they won't believe you. Being on this end is so hard.
But the one that left must live alone too. You don't just walk out of a relationship and not look back. There are memories of so many good times as well as the bad. But you feel safer loving from a distance, the hurt is not right in your face. If you want to you can change the channel on your mind and not think about it. You can refuse calls, return mail, and not answer emails. The new land that you are in looks nicer, and there are new people to talk to, but there is no one here that knows you like the ones you left behind. You may think that life is rosy here, but it's not at all familiar, and not really where you want to be. Being on this end is so hard. It isn't all fun like they think it must be. But it's risky thinking about coming back. What if it starts all over again? What if all I gained is lost? What about when people talk? You think it may be easier just staying here so you don't have to go through all that.
The one constant, dear Reader, in both sides of this one situation is that Jesus is there with you. He is never far away. He wants you to run to Him, not walk! Like a child, run with arms open and jump into His loving embrace! Squeeze your arms around His neck and laugh and cry and just hang on! He doesn't want you to feel like you have done too many things that can't be forgiven. He will forgive, He says so. All you have to do is ask, and then show Him that you mean it. Don't ever feel like you don't know how to go to Him. It really isn't so hard to find a brother or sister in Christ to go to. Sometimes it is just a phone call away, sometimes it takes going to church, either way, help and comfort is there wherever you are.
The struggle to find our one true love is difficult. We search and go through sorrow, happiness, doubt, and expectations. But when we first begin a relationship that we want to last we are hopeful. It is like that when we find Jesus. We hear it will be wonderful, but will it last? Are we ready to come to Him with all the sin in our heart and ask for forgiveness? We start to feel undeserving because of the things we have done or are doing. We realize we became too much like the world and although we forgot that it would disappoint Him we remember that now.
Living in God's will is not easy. It is not filled with joy every moment. Being a good Christian is the hardest thing anyone will ever do. It is a commitment to Him. It is saying that we are ready to go through the furnace knowing that He is in there with us, even when the heat is turned up (see Daniel chapter 3). It is willing to do what you know is right even though the flesh is screaming "No! Don't submit yourself to that again!" If you have seen the Almighty work in the one you left behind, and you know that it will be different, go back. There is nothing for you where you are. But go with Jesus in your heart. Don't expect things to be different without that. No changes in you or them will happen without God in your life.
If you haven't yet found Jesus and surrounded yourself with His love and forgiveness, you need to. As long as there is a tugging in your heart that draws you back, you need to get on your knees and make it right with Him first. Don't put it off. He really is your one true love.
There needs to be welcome arms like Jesus has for the one who returns. Just feast and celebration, no questions, just like the Lost Son's father (see Nov 11 entry in this blog) had for him. There will be time for remembering and sharing later. But there should be only love, on both sides. We are all part of the father and part of the son in that parable, but forgiveness and asking for forgiveness changes our world. Of course the father is God, who we try to emulate, and the son is all of us.
Keep steady, dear Reader, do as He tells you; when He tells you to move, then move! Throw away your fears and rest in the love and strength of Jesus. Be willing to be humble. He will carry you through!
Click on link
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bcLurY1GnEE
They had to have had a reason to leave or they wouldn't have in the first place. Now the question comes, "What could I have done differently?" but all the reasoning in the world doesn't change things. They left. You are alone and lonely and so sorry for all the things you didn't know you could have fixed. You would do anything at all for that one you so desperately love. You want to say 'Please come back!' but you are afraid they will say no. You want to say, "I will do anything you ask, I'm different now, I have finally found my way, I'm sorry that I made you leave." But you are afraid they won't believe you. Being on this end is so hard.
But the one that left must live alone too. You don't just walk out of a relationship and not look back. There are memories of so many good times as well as the bad. But you feel safer loving from a distance, the hurt is not right in your face. If you want to you can change the channel on your mind and not think about it. You can refuse calls, return mail, and not answer emails. The new land that you are in looks nicer, and there are new people to talk to, but there is no one here that knows you like the ones you left behind. You may think that life is rosy here, but it's not at all familiar, and not really where you want to be. Being on this end is so hard. It isn't all fun like they think it must be. But it's risky thinking about coming back. What if it starts all over again? What if all I gained is lost? What about when people talk? You think it may be easier just staying here so you don't have to go through all that.
The one constant, dear Reader, in both sides of this one situation is that Jesus is there with you. He is never far away. He wants you to run to Him, not walk! Like a child, run with arms open and jump into His loving embrace! Squeeze your arms around His neck and laugh and cry and just hang on! He doesn't want you to feel like you have done too many things that can't be forgiven. He will forgive, He says so. All you have to do is ask, and then show Him that you mean it. Don't ever feel like you don't know how to go to Him. It really isn't so hard to find a brother or sister in Christ to go to. Sometimes it is just a phone call away, sometimes it takes going to church, either way, help and comfort is there wherever you are.
The struggle to find our one true love is difficult. We search and go through sorrow, happiness, doubt, and expectations. But when we first begin a relationship that we want to last we are hopeful. It is like that when we find Jesus. We hear it will be wonderful, but will it last? Are we ready to come to Him with all the sin in our heart and ask for forgiveness? We start to feel undeserving because of the things we have done or are doing. We realize we became too much like the world and although we forgot that it would disappoint Him we remember that now.
Living in God's will is not easy. It is not filled with joy every moment. Being a good Christian is the hardest thing anyone will ever do. It is a commitment to Him. It is saying that we are ready to go through the furnace knowing that He is in there with us, even when the heat is turned up (see Daniel chapter 3). It is willing to do what you know is right even though the flesh is screaming "No! Don't submit yourself to that again!" If you have seen the Almighty work in the one you left behind, and you know that it will be different, go back. There is nothing for you where you are. But go with Jesus in your heart. Don't expect things to be different without that. No changes in you or them will happen without God in your life.
If you haven't yet found Jesus and surrounded yourself with His love and forgiveness, you need to. As long as there is a tugging in your heart that draws you back, you need to get on your knees and make it right with Him first. Don't put it off. He really is your one true love.
There needs to be welcome arms like Jesus has for the one who returns. Just feast and celebration, no questions, just like the Lost Son's father (see Nov 11 entry in this blog) had for him. There will be time for remembering and sharing later. But there should be only love, on both sides. We are all part of the father and part of the son in that parable, but forgiveness and asking for forgiveness changes our world. Of course the father is God, who we try to emulate, and the son is all of us.
Keep steady, dear Reader, do as He tells you; when He tells you to move, then move! Throw away your fears and rest in the love and strength of Jesus. Be willing to be humble. He will carry you through!
Click on link
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bcLurY1GnEE
Friday, December 16, 2011
Good Morning, World!
I just want to wish you a good day today, filled with all the blessings of the Lord. There are only 9 days left til Christmas. I haven't finished getting ready! I will accomplish great things today, in the name of the Lord Most High God! He is my Salvation and Strength, He takes pleasure in watching me grow!
Today I commit my day to Him. I don't know what the enemy has in store, but he doesn't leave me alone for too long at any one time, so I am going to rely on Jesus to get me through it all. I would say that is trusting God, wouldn't you? I need to just rest in the Lord. I want to sit at His feet, feel His heartbeat.
Enjoy the song and have a blessed day!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b4crRPpqoW4&feature=related
Til tomorrow, go with God! Let Him lead you down that road to Heaven's Gate.
Today I commit my day to Him. I don't know what the enemy has in store, but he doesn't leave me alone for too long at any one time, so I am going to rely on Jesus to get me through it all. I would say that is trusting God, wouldn't you? I need to just rest in the Lord. I want to sit at His feet, feel His heartbeat.
Enjoy the song and have a blessed day!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b4crRPpqoW4&feature=related
Til tomorrow, go with God! Let Him lead you down that road to Heaven's Gate.
Thursday, December 15, 2011
Trusting God for Healing and Restoration
"Then your light shall break forth like the morning, your healing shall spring forth speedily, and your righteousness shall go before you; the glory of the Lord shall be your rear guard. Then you shall call, and the Lord will answer; you shall cry, and He will say, ‘Here I am.’" Isaiah 58:8-9 (NKJ)
I have some friends that are in need of prayer for healing. I trust that God will answer the prayers of all those who believe in His healing powers. I have two friends that had replacement surgery, one for her hip and one for her shoulder. I have one that is undergoing tests to find out what makes her feel dizzy and why she gets pneumonia so often. Another has a mass around the bottom of his esophagus that has caused him to lose an enormous amount of weight. The doctors aren't sure what it is, it doesn't seem to be cancer, but they are not sure about what to do, as they have never seen this before. I have a dear friend who almost 'bled out' last week, a few days after having a polyp removed during a colonoscopy, who thankfully is better now. And another, a very sweet woman I only met last week had a biopsy come back positive. She will be having a pet scan soon. I don't know exactly what that is, but I do know what I will be praying.
Like I said, I only met this young woman last week, but her faith in God impressed me. She is a lovely girl (I say girl because I'm old enough to be her mother). She had breast cancer in the past, but I don't know how long ago or what the prognosis was. I cried thinking about her yesterday. She has a little girl who is 8, and a little boy, only four years old. I refuse to believe that they will grow up without her! I just won't accept even the possibility! I rebuke Satan and claim clean health and purity of her cells in the name of Jesus of Nazareth! I claim that she will be there when her daughter goes to the prom and graduates high school and will help her get dressed on her wedding day, and will cuddle her grandchildren in her arms on cold winter nights. I claim that God will get the glory for this Christmas miracle!
James 5:16 says: "Confess your trespasses to one another, and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The effective, fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much." So I am in prayer. This morning on my way to work I thought about what was the most important thing to me this Christmas, what I wanted very much. I have a large inventory of books I desperately need to sell so that I can pay for them.
But you know what, dear Reader? Today I lay them at God's feet. This is His book, after all, and I have done my best. It's time for me to sit down and let Him do the rest. Let me watch a miracle happen. I will do my signings this weekend in Georgetown, Tx and Salado, Tx, but other than that, I will be prepared for people to come to me and buy, but it's time to give the Almighty a chance to do what He does best.
I have traded my hopes of my entire inventory being sold for healing and restoration. This young lady needs her body healed and restored to God's original design. I know of a young couple whose marriage suffered a considerable amount of damage and it needs healing and restoration. This couple means the world to me. They don't know the enormity of how much I care about them and their marriage being restored. They are spending time hours apart learning how to listen to God and how to know who they are. I think that's all well and good, but I think their separation has become a crutch. God ordained their marriage; whether they want to admit it or not, He was at their wedding, and He blessed it. By not following God's plan for their lives, for putting Him on the back burner, Satan managed to go in there and destroy their lives. They have since turned back to God, but it is taking a long time for them to turn back to each other. Please, Lord, fix these things that are broken!
That's all I want for Christmas. Healing and restoration. So many lives are affected because the enemy has attacked the two things that are most important to us, health and relationships that were blessed by God. John 10:10 says, "The thief does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy." As my Pastor says, "He will kill you with a hangnail if he can." The devil doesn't care HOW you suffer, just that you do. But we have to remember the second half of that verse, "I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly." Trust Him!
I don't have any money put aside for gifts this Christmas, and I am quite in debt because I wrote a sweet little book about childhood innocence. But you know what? This is God's book, He brought it to life, not me, I didn't have any inkling about writing a children's Christmas book! He just needed me to get it out there. He has already determined who will buy the book. God has a plan that I have been obedient to, and I don't regret my financial status at the moment, because I trust God to move the inventory. I can't buy anything for my loving husband, or my daughter and son-in-law. I just don't have the cash right now. But you know what? I don't care! And neither do they! It's not about the presents as much as it is about the presence! We will sit down together in thanksgiving to God and Jesus and have a wonderful Christmas roast! My Christmas will be complete knowing that my family is together, even if only for a little while before the kids have to leave. If I did have the riches of a monarch, I would trade it for my friends' healing and restoration!
Please believe with me this Christmas that God hears all prayers and will take back from the enemy that which was stolen. He has already gone before us and claimed victory! All we have to do is receive it.
Dear Father In Heaven,
I come before you in the name of the Kings of kings, Jesus of Nazareth, my Lord and Savior. I ask you, Father, for a blessing I can hardly contain. I ask that instead of giving me my Christmas wish of selling books, that you instead use my blessing to heal my new friend, to make the tests show that there is nothing, absolutely nothing wrong with her. Let the doctors be baffled, let the glory go to you! Let there be a wonderful testimony about how much you love us!
Father God, I would do anything to see this marriage restored. These young people mean more to me than I can tell them. Their marriage is so important, I believe that they don't even know exactly how important it is. Lord, in Matthew 19:6, you say, "So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.” Please, Father, bring them back together. Not as friends, but as husband and wife. Let the hurts of the past be forgiven, let their eyes be opened to the changes that have taken place in each other, let each see the other's desire be to correct where they have gone wrong. They have reached out to You, my Lord, in faith and trust. I know that You are there, and I know that I must trust You. Ecc 4:12 (NLT) says, "A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken." You are the Third, with You all things are possible for those that just believe!
Thank You for hearing my prayer, Father, and thank You for my life. Although I struggle, I know that I am growing. I know that I am making progress in the Kingdom when my desires are for the benefit of someone else. I give them to You, to heal and restore. I trust You, God! I trust You! And please bless those that read this today that their prayers are also answered and a peace comes to them. Thank You!
Your daughter,
Deirdre
I have some friends that are in need of prayer for healing. I trust that God will answer the prayers of all those who believe in His healing powers. I have two friends that had replacement surgery, one for her hip and one for her shoulder. I have one that is undergoing tests to find out what makes her feel dizzy and why she gets pneumonia so often. Another has a mass around the bottom of his esophagus that has caused him to lose an enormous amount of weight. The doctors aren't sure what it is, it doesn't seem to be cancer, but they are not sure about what to do, as they have never seen this before. I have a dear friend who almost 'bled out' last week, a few days after having a polyp removed during a colonoscopy, who thankfully is better now. And another, a very sweet woman I only met last week had a biopsy come back positive. She will be having a pet scan soon. I don't know exactly what that is, but I do know what I will be praying.
Like I said, I only met this young woman last week, but her faith in God impressed me. She is a lovely girl (I say girl because I'm old enough to be her mother). She had breast cancer in the past, but I don't know how long ago or what the prognosis was. I cried thinking about her yesterday. She has a little girl who is 8, and a little boy, only four years old. I refuse to believe that they will grow up without her! I just won't accept even the possibility! I rebuke Satan and claim clean health and purity of her cells in the name of Jesus of Nazareth! I claim that she will be there when her daughter goes to the prom and graduates high school and will help her get dressed on her wedding day, and will cuddle her grandchildren in her arms on cold winter nights. I claim that God will get the glory for this Christmas miracle!
James 5:16 says: "Confess your trespasses to one another, and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The effective, fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much." So I am in prayer. This morning on my way to work I thought about what was the most important thing to me this Christmas, what I wanted very much. I have a large inventory of books I desperately need to sell so that I can pay for them.
But you know what, dear Reader? Today I lay them at God's feet. This is His book, after all, and I have done my best. It's time for me to sit down and let Him do the rest. Let me watch a miracle happen. I will do my signings this weekend in Georgetown, Tx and Salado, Tx, but other than that, I will be prepared for people to come to me and buy, but it's time to give the Almighty a chance to do what He does best.
I have traded my hopes of my entire inventory being sold for healing and restoration. This young lady needs her body healed and restored to God's original design. I know of a young couple whose marriage suffered a considerable amount of damage and it needs healing and restoration. This couple means the world to me. They don't know the enormity of how much I care about them and their marriage being restored. They are spending time hours apart learning how to listen to God and how to know who they are. I think that's all well and good, but I think their separation has become a crutch. God ordained their marriage; whether they want to admit it or not, He was at their wedding, and He blessed it. By not following God's plan for their lives, for putting Him on the back burner, Satan managed to go in there and destroy their lives. They have since turned back to God, but it is taking a long time for them to turn back to each other. Please, Lord, fix these things that are broken!
That's all I want for Christmas. Healing and restoration. So many lives are affected because the enemy has attacked the two things that are most important to us, health and relationships that were blessed by God. John 10:10 says, "The thief does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy." As my Pastor says, "He will kill you with a hangnail if he can." The devil doesn't care HOW you suffer, just that you do. But we have to remember the second half of that verse, "I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly." Trust Him!
I don't have any money put aside for gifts this Christmas, and I am quite in debt because I wrote a sweet little book about childhood innocence. But you know what? This is God's book, He brought it to life, not me, I didn't have any inkling about writing a children's Christmas book! He just needed me to get it out there. He has already determined who will buy the book. God has a plan that I have been obedient to, and I don't regret my financial status at the moment, because I trust God to move the inventory. I can't buy anything for my loving husband, or my daughter and son-in-law. I just don't have the cash right now. But you know what? I don't care! And neither do they! It's not about the presents as much as it is about the presence! We will sit down together in thanksgiving to God and Jesus and have a wonderful Christmas roast! My Christmas will be complete knowing that my family is together, even if only for a little while before the kids have to leave. If I did have the riches of a monarch, I would trade it for my friends' healing and restoration!
Please believe with me this Christmas that God hears all prayers and will take back from the enemy that which was stolen. He has already gone before us and claimed victory! All we have to do is receive it.
Dear Father In Heaven,
I come before you in the name of the Kings of kings, Jesus of Nazareth, my Lord and Savior. I ask you, Father, for a blessing I can hardly contain. I ask that instead of giving me my Christmas wish of selling books, that you instead use my blessing to heal my new friend, to make the tests show that there is nothing, absolutely nothing wrong with her. Let the doctors be baffled, let the glory go to you! Let there be a wonderful testimony about how much you love us!
Father God, I would do anything to see this marriage restored. These young people mean more to me than I can tell them. Their marriage is so important, I believe that they don't even know exactly how important it is. Lord, in Matthew 19:6, you say, "So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.” Please, Father, bring them back together. Not as friends, but as husband and wife. Let the hurts of the past be forgiven, let their eyes be opened to the changes that have taken place in each other, let each see the other's desire be to correct where they have gone wrong. They have reached out to You, my Lord, in faith and trust. I know that You are there, and I know that I must trust You. Ecc 4:12 (NLT) says, "A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken." You are the Third, with You all things are possible for those that just believe!
Thank You for hearing my prayer, Father, and thank You for my life. Although I struggle, I know that I am growing. I know that I am making progress in the Kingdom when my desires are for the benefit of someone else. I give them to You, to heal and restore. I trust You, God! I trust You! And please bless those that read this today that their prayers are also answered and a peace comes to them. Thank You!
Your daughter,
Deirdre
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
Trust, Trust, Trust
I have quite a few books in my house that I need to sell before the end of the week so that I can have them delivered for Christmas. I need to pay the bill on these books, and all I know to do now is to pray that God will sell them. Will He? It's His book! That's what everyone keeps telling me. I am supposed to watch Him perform a miracle. Well, dear Reader, that's exactly what I am going to do. I have a very large bill that needs to be paid. God has the resources. Is there anything the Lord can't do? I have to say emphatically NO! Will He? I must trust in His word that He will not leave nor forsake me. Why would He place this book in my life and then leave me in debt, worried through this beautiful season?
He wouldn't. But the devil would! Christmas is only 10 days away now. I still have two signing events this weekend, but other than that it all comes down to who is going to buy these books on line through my website. I am going to believe that has all been accomplished in His name, by those He chose to buy. There is more exposure because of the TV show and the radio broadcast, so I will put my faith (the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen - Hebrews 11:1) and trust in Him today. I am going to spend the next 10 days looking forward to Christmas.
I am going to believe in healing in family relationships, that all those that are separated from their husbands or wives will be returning safely and with a renewed love for each other. I pray that they will be coming home for Christmas. Not just for a visit, not to keep a distance between each other because of past hurts, no, they are coming home because that is what God intended. That marriages heal.
All marriages suffer growing pains, it is a given, we are all different, that's what attracted us to each other in the first place. We have times where our pride comes between us and nobody wants to be the first to say I'm sorry, I was wrong. Or if they weren't wrong, to instead of holding on to a crippled memory, say, I forgive you. I need you.
For those that are struggling with being the one to make the first move and open the door to what God ordained in their lives, to grasp once again the innocence of that new love so long ago (it's still there, you know), I say, TRUST! TRUST! Let God heal you. Have the courage to kick the devil in the teeth and declare, "Not by my strength, but by God's, by Jesus of Nazareth's authority, I take back that which was stolen! I ask God to restore my broken heart and my broken marriage! Give us back the dreams we had in our youth, and show us one again that with Christ, ALL things are possible!"
Be bold! Go to the throne of God and ask for His divine help in bringing your marriage back together, to help you to remember why you got married in the first place, and the changes that came because you didn't keep God first. It's not too late, He is just waiting for you to say, "God, help me. Give me the courage to make new memories, to know that I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me!"
Ask Him for forgiveness of your sins, for straying not just from your spouse and maybe your family, but for straying from Him! He celebrates our devotion to Him. He understands when we walk off the path! He longs for us to come to Him and ask for His forgiveness and help. And dear Reader, believe me, He WILL NEVER say no to you when you want to do something that is good. He will get the glory! How wonderful! Give God a gift!
Come home, forget the hurt, don't make excuses anymore. It is the right time. No one will judge you, and you walk in God's light. Tell the devil to go to Hell, you are a child of God, and your Lord is Jesus of Nazareth! Pick up that sword and fight! Hold on to your spouse and fight together! Your marriage is God's gift to you. Don't toss it aside and say it's broken! God fixes all things if we lay them at His feet! Don't be afraid. Fear is not from God, it is from Satan. Fight! Show him that God is first in your life, that even if you can't see the good outcome, God can, and He will make it right. Don't wait a minute longer!
Have a blessed day, dear Reader. Go with God. His ways are not always understood by us, but they are always right. If you hear the calling of the Holy Spirit to go home, now, start packing, then do it. Obey. Don't reason, don't use logic, don't disobey. Just do it. You'll see, He is there. Let Him drive the car. You just sit back and see what He has for you. Don't look back, evil awaits there. Look forward! Smile! He is holding your hand!
God bless you. I don't know who that is for, but we all love you very much. Let us know how things worked out. Happy Wednesday!
Deirdre
To buy a book, go to www.deirdretolhurst.com, shopping page. Thank you.
He wouldn't. But the devil would! Christmas is only 10 days away now. I still have two signing events this weekend, but other than that it all comes down to who is going to buy these books on line through my website. I am going to believe that has all been accomplished in His name, by those He chose to buy. There is more exposure because of the TV show and the radio broadcast, so I will put my faith (the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen - Hebrews 11:1) and trust in Him today. I am going to spend the next 10 days looking forward to Christmas.
I am going to believe in healing in family relationships, that all those that are separated from their husbands or wives will be returning safely and with a renewed love for each other. I pray that they will be coming home for Christmas. Not just for a visit, not to keep a distance between each other because of past hurts, no, they are coming home because that is what God intended. That marriages heal.
All marriages suffer growing pains, it is a given, we are all different, that's what attracted us to each other in the first place. We have times where our pride comes between us and nobody wants to be the first to say I'm sorry, I was wrong. Or if they weren't wrong, to instead of holding on to a crippled memory, say, I forgive you. I need you.
For those that are struggling with being the one to make the first move and open the door to what God ordained in their lives, to grasp once again the innocence of that new love so long ago (it's still there, you know), I say, TRUST! TRUST! Let God heal you. Have the courage to kick the devil in the teeth and declare, "Not by my strength, but by God's, by Jesus of Nazareth's authority, I take back that which was stolen! I ask God to restore my broken heart and my broken marriage! Give us back the dreams we had in our youth, and show us one again that with Christ, ALL things are possible!"
Be bold! Go to the throne of God and ask for His divine help in bringing your marriage back together, to help you to remember why you got married in the first place, and the changes that came because you didn't keep God first. It's not too late, He is just waiting for you to say, "God, help me. Give me the courage to make new memories, to know that I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me!"
Ask Him for forgiveness of your sins, for straying not just from your spouse and maybe your family, but for straying from Him! He celebrates our devotion to Him. He understands when we walk off the path! He longs for us to come to Him and ask for His forgiveness and help. And dear Reader, believe me, He WILL NEVER say no to you when you want to do something that is good. He will get the glory! How wonderful! Give God a gift!
Come home, forget the hurt, don't make excuses anymore. It is the right time. No one will judge you, and you walk in God's light. Tell the devil to go to Hell, you are a child of God, and your Lord is Jesus of Nazareth! Pick up that sword and fight! Hold on to your spouse and fight together! Your marriage is God's gift to you. Don't toss it aside and say it's broken! God fixes all things if we lay them at His feet! Don't be afraid. Fear is not from God, it is from Satan. Fight! Show him that God is first in your life, that even if you can't see the good outcome, God can, and He will make it right. Don't wait a minute longer!
Have a blessed day, dear Reader. Go with God. His ways are not always understood by us, but they are always right. If you hear the calling of the Holy Spirit to go home, now, start packing, then do it. Obey. Don't reason, don't use logic, don't disobey. Just do it. You'll see, He is there. Let Him drive the car. You just sit back and see what He has for you. Don't look back, evil awaits there. Look forward! Smile! He is holding your hand!
God bless you. I don't know who that is for, but we all love you very much. Let us know how things worked out. Happy Wednesday!
Deirdre
To buy a book, go to www.deirdretolhurst.com, shopping page. Thank you.
Monday, December 12, 2011
Trusting God This Afternoon
Today I will be on local TV. This is something new for me. I haven't been on TV since I was 3 or so. I was on the Bozo the Clown show in NY with my sister and brother. I don't remember much about it. Today I will be on the Mom's Everyday show on local TV. I am very calm. Twice my appearance has been cancelled. I don't know why the first time, but the second time, last Friday was because a young man from Baylor University, Robert Griffin III, known as RGIII, had become a finalist for the coveted Heisman Trophy. So the station ran a repeat show with his Mom. I have no complaints about that, it is a great achievement, and he is a young man of God! Congratulations to them!
So today I will be on. Maybe God didn't think I was ready on Friday. Maybe I wasn't. I have a peace about me today. I trust God today. I took the day off work to spend time with Jesus, reading the Word, and praising and worshipping Him. I want to feel His presence all around me as I travel and sit in the studio. Christmas is only 12 shopping days away now, and I have many books to sell. But He has told me that He will take care of it, not to worry or fret, but to trust Him.
I don't know all the plans God has for me, and I don't know when they will come, but they will come, because He doesn't just leave us alone to go nowhere. When there is a desire in a heart, as there is in mine, He speaks and gives direction. It's up to me to listen and follow His rules or to sit back because it is too difficult. Believe me, being on national radio and now TV and signing books and selling my book would not have been easy for me in the least had I not gone into His rest. He has so much more for me that I don't even know about yet.
But first He wants me to cross the raging river, and all I see are the waves and the debris going by. "It's too hard" I cry! "I can't get over to the other side! Why did You tell me to cross?" I can see my reward on the other side - my husband's dream house, just like in the picture we have. God is saying, "Trust Me, follow Me," and He has His hand out, ready to lead me, and all I see is the river, the white caps. "No, I can't!" I cry again.
I don't trust Him, I'm afraid of being swallowed up in the water. He is very patient. Maybe He steps back and lets the water reach to where I am. Finally, I will have to take His hand, because there is NO PLACE ELSE TO GO! And what will He do? He won't push me in the raging torrent and yell, "Swim, Deirdre, I taught you to swim." No, He will lead me to the bridge that was just out of my sight, just around the bend!
I was so consumed with the here and now that I couldn't see anything but failure. I didn't realize I caused my own failure. If I just took His hand and trusted Him, as a child would, I would have crossed that obstacle that much sooner. Instead, I walked around the mountain one more time.
Dear reader, we must learn to trust God in everything that goes on, not just in our own life, but in the lives of all those we love, and of the world, and all the governments. God is in charge! God has the vault where the tornadoes wait for Him to release them. He has rooms full of hail, and lightning. He causes the rain! But just the same, He brings the cloudless sky filled with warm sunshine and gentle breezes. We have a destiny. And we have the choice to let it be a great and rewarding destiny or one filled with trouble and despair. We either 'let go and let God' or miss out on the glory after glory He wants us to enjoy.
So let's try harder today to trust Him. Let's start with an hour at a time, or a minute, whatever it takes. He is very gracious and will wait. Let us draw our strength from Jesus, because it is through Him, after all, that all things are possible. (Phil 4:13)
So today I will be on. Maybe God didn't think I was ready on Friday. Maybe I wasn't. I have a peace about me today. I trust God today. I took the day off work to spend time with Jesus, reading the Word, and praising and worshipping Him. I want to feel His presence all around me as I travel and sit in the studio. Christmas is only 12 shopping days away now, and I have many books to sell. But He has told me that He will take care of it, not to worry or fret, but to trust Him.
I don't know all the plans God has for me, and I don't know when they will come, but they will come, because He doesn't just leave us alone to go nowhere. When there is a desire in a heart, as there is in mine, He speaks and gives direction. It's up to me to listen and follow His rules or to sit back because it is too difficult. Believe me, being on national radio and now TV and signing books and selling my book would not have been easy for me in the least had I not gone into His rest. He has so much more for me that I don't even know about yet.
But first He wants me to cross the raging river, and all I see are the waves and the debris going by. "It's too hard" I cry! "I can't get over to the other side! Why did You tell me to cross?" I can see my reward on the other side - my husband's dream house, just like in the picture we have. God is saying, "Trust Me, follow Me," and He has His hand out, ready to lead me, and all I see is the river, the white caps. "No, I can't!" I cry again.
I don't trust Him, I'm afraid of being swallowed up in the water. He is very patient. Maybe He steps back and lets the water reach to where I am. Finally, I will have to take His hand, because there is NO PLACE ELSE TO GO! And what will He do? He won't push me in the raging torrent and yell, "Swim, Deirdre, I taught you to swim." No, He will lead me to the bridge that was just out of my sight, just around the bend!
I was so consumed with the here and now that I couldn't see anything but failure. I didn't realize I caused my own failure. If I just took His hand and trusted Him, as a child would, I would have crossed that obstacle that much sooner. Instead, I walked around the mountain one more time.
Dear reader, we must learn to trust God in everything that goes on, not just in our own life, but in the lives of all those we love, and of the world, and all the governments. God is in charge! God has the vault where the tornadoes wait for Him to release them. He has rooms full of hail, and lightning. He causes the rain! But just the same, He brings the cloudless sky filled with warm sunshine and gentle breezes. We have a destiny. And we have the choice to let it be a great and rewarding destiny or one filled with trouble and despair. We either 'let go and let God' or miss out on the glory after glory He wants us to enjoy.
So let's try harder today to trust Him. Let's start with an hour at a time, or a minute, whatever it takes. He is very gracious and will wait. Let us draw our strength from Jesus, because it is through Him, after all, that all things are possible. (Phil 4:13)
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
How Do I Trust Today?
With all my heart. I must not lean on my own understanding (Proverbs 3:5). What does that mean to me? It means that no matter what happens, that if everything around me gets all topsy-turvey, that I must not even try to reason about it, that I must know in my heart that God has already taken care of it.
The next verse (v6) says that in all my ways I should acknowledge Him and He will direct my path. How do I do that? I must exercise doing that. I need to more consciously place Him in front of me. I pray to the Holy Spirit in fervor, "Please stay right in front of my mind! Let me always keep my eyes on Christ!" But it doesn't happen. I believe that God wants us to do that ourselves. Sure, He could do that, but then what have we accomplished? Nothing. We didn't learn to rely on Him for ourselves. He will not make slaves out of us, forcing us to see only Him. He wants to be the desire of our heart. He wants us to keep realizing we have strayed and to come home.
It isn't hard to stray, is it? So many times I walk off the path of righteousness and find myself in a dangerous place. Sometimes my own flesh holds me back from coming 'home.' For instance, there are mornings when my husband and I have prayed together, and then sometime before I leave for work in the next hour something will go wrong and I will take it out on him. He is innocent, I am the one that is off schedule. But my pride isn't quick to step down and let me ask for forgiveness. I can see the hurt I have placed in his heart by something I've said, yet I speed off in anger.
Not far down the road, the Holy Spirit quickens me that I need to apologize for my actions. To Him and and to my husband. I weep, dear reader, I sob. I cry out to God for forgiveness. I know He has shown me compassion once again, but I also know that I am not done. Part of my repentance is to apologize to my husband. So I call, and I cry and tell him that I am sorry, that I love him, and he forgives me because he understands me better than I do, and he loves me without limits.
There are times when I feel so bad about what I have done that I don't feel good enough to walk back in God's light. Has that ever happened to you? You want desperately to know that God is smiling on you but in your state of misery for hurting someone you love so much you just don't feel like you're worthy? That isn't a good place to be. You ARE worthy! God forgives us and then throws the sin into the sea of forgetfulness. He forgets about it, totally. He doesn't hold on to it like I might. I don't understand it. I know that it is the devil that causes me to hold on. While I am deliberately keeping myself out of the Kingdom and all God's blessings, he is free to go corrupt someone else. His job is done, he has left me wallowing in condemnation, and I am not in the light of the Lord. I sin again by staying in self pity. How can I not forgive myself when God and my husband already have?
That is something I keep working on, and I think I am getting better at it. God doesn't want us to condemn ourselves. Forgiving ourselves is sometimes harder than forgiving someone else, isn't it? We must remember that God sees us much different than we do. Because of Jesus' sacrifice, we are the righteousness of God in Christ (2 Cor 5:21). And when we obey, "the Lord will make you the head and not the tail; you shall be above only, and not be beneath." Deu 28:13.
This is all part of trust as well. That God WILL forgive us and forget the sin if we are truly repentant and obey Him. He has told us that He will not leave or forsake us. Do we trust Him to really be there? Even when it is so dark we can't see the hand in front of our spiritual face? We'd better, because the only way we are going to conquer evil in our lives is to allow God to lead us! We have to trust that He will always be there to do that. Start today. Just accept that Jesus is with you. He is in the car with you as drive to work, He sits at the same desk, He is on the school bus with your child, He is at the grocery store, the cleaners, the park, the subway, everywhere!! You can't run away from Him, and you really don't want to.
So, I keep saying out loud, "I trust You, God!" again and again. That's all. Out loud. Try it. I brings me peace, maybe it will for you too. And if you have to say it every few seconds, so be it. Eventually it comes easier and easier.
God bless you today, and everyday. Together we will get this, I know it in my heart. I want to trust, I really do. There is so much to share with you as days go on. I must defeat the enemy and my own flesh. I am more than a conqueror! Amen!
The next verse (v6) says that in all my ways I should acknowledge Him and He will direct my path. How do I do that? I must exercise doing that. I need to more consciously place Him in front of me. I pray to the Holy Spirit in fervor, "Please stay right in front of my mind! Let me always keep my eyes on Christ!" But it doesn't happen. I believe that God wants us to do that ourselves. Sure, He could do that, but then what have we accomplished? Nothing. We didn't learn to rely on Him for ourselves. He will not make slaves out of us, forcing us to see only Him. He wants to be the desire of our heart. He wants us to keep realizing we have strayed and to come home.
It isn't hard to stray, is it? So many times I walk off the path of righteousness and find myself in a dangerous place. Sometimes my own flesh holds me back from coming 'home.' For instance, there are mornings when my husband and I have prayed together, and then sometime before I leave for work in the next hour something will go wrong and I will take it out on him. He is innocent, I am the one that is off schedule. But my pride isn't quick to step down and let me ask for forgiveness. I can see the hurt I have placed in his heart by something I've said, yet I speed off in anger.
Not far down the road, the Holy Spirit quickens me that I need to apologize for my actions. To Him and and to my husband. I weep, dear reader, I sob. I cry out to God for forgiveness. I know He has shown me compassion once again, but I also know that I am not done. Part of my repentance is to apologize to my husband. So I call, and I cry and tell him that I am sorry, that I love him, and he forgives me because he understands me better than I do, and he loves me without limits.
There are times when I feel so bad about what I have done that I don't feel good enough to walk back in God's light. Has that ever happened to you? You want desperately to know that God is smiling on you but in your state of misery for hurting someone you love so much you just don't feel like you're worthy? That isn't a good place to be. You ARE worthy! God forgives us and then throws the sin into the sea of forgetfulness. He forgets about it, totally. He doesn't hold on to it like I might. I don't understand it. I know that it is the devil that causes me to hold on. While I am deliberately keeping myself out of the Kingdom and all God's blessings, he is free to go corrupt someone else. His job is done, he has left me wallowing in condemnation, and I am not in the light of the Lord. I sin again by staying in self pity. How can I not forgive myself when God and my husband already have?
That is something I keep working on, and I think I am getting better at it. God doesn't want us to condemn ourselves. Forgiving ourselves is sometimes harder than forgiving someone else, isn't it? We must remember that God sees us much different than we do. Because of Jesus' sacrifice, we are the righteousness of God in Christ (2 Cor 5:21). And when we obey, "the Lord will make you the head and not the tail; you shall be above only, and not be beneath." Deu 28:13.
This is all part of trust as well. That God WILL forgive us and forget the sin if we are truly repentant and obey Him. He has told us that He will not leave or forsake us. Do we trust Him to really be there? Even when it is so dark we can't see the hand in front of our spiritual face? We'd better, because the only way we are going to conquer evil in our lives is to allow God to lead us! We have to trust that He will always be there to do that. Start today. Just accept that Jesus is with you. He is in the car with you as drive to work, He sits at the same desk, He is on the school bus with your child, He is at the grocery store, the cleaners, the park, the subway, everywhere!! You can't run away from Him, and you really don't want to.
So, I keep saying out loud, "I trust You, God!" again and again. That's all. Out loud. Try it. I brings me peace, maybe it will for you too. And if you have to say it every few seconds, so be it. Eventually it comes easier and easier.
God bless you today, and everyday. Together we will get this, I know it in my heart. I want to trust, I really do. There is so much to share with you as days go on. I must defeat the enemy and my own flesh. I am more than a conqueror! Amen!
Monday, December 5, 2011
Reaching a Crossroads, and Trusting God
Here I am at a crossroads, wondering how do I move forward? In which way do I travel? I will take the road that God has chosen for me. Luke 12:12 in the Message Bible says, "The right words will be there. The Holy Spirit will give you the right words when the time comes."
Yesterday in church a friend came to me with a message from the Lord. She said that when I hugged her as I came in, she felt the Lord tell her to reassure me that things would be starting small, and I should not be worried about anything, He is in charge. He has a great thing for me, later. First I must learn how to deal with the small. I am thinking that this is about the inventory of books I have in my house and the angst I have about selling them in the next 2½ weeks. Eight months ago, my facilitator in my International School of Ministry class told me to not despise the day of small beginnings. God has told me that too.
This was a reminder of what He spoke to me on August 6, this year. "Your web page will be slow in getting started, but as word gets out more and more will come to it for a drink of comfort. It will be plain and simple, nothing fancy and intimidating. Just follow what I tell you to place out there. Each day, pray first.
"Deirdre, don't think you can do this without Me. It will fail if you try. I will tell you what to put there. It may only be a sentence, or just a scripture, or a long story. But I will tell you. Get the attitude that this is My web site and you are the steward. Just do your job - make sure that the information I give you goes out and then go about your business. Do not let this become an obsession for you.
"You are going to reach the people that no one else has been able to. When you pray for a laborer to reach those you love that are lost, I am sending someone there. Just the same, I am using you as a laborer to others. There are people praying for their friends and family, and their loved ones aren't listening to them. But you will reach them. I will inspire you and you will write what I want them to hear. I will direct their path to find your web site amongst the millions out there. You will help save people that you will only meet in Heaven.
"That's it, smile! Be of good cheer! There is a positive outcome. I am in you, and you are in Me, so we are one. We together will proclaim the good news! Smile! Rejoice! Let your heart sing! I love you, child! Do not worry, trust and obey. I will lead you to what I want you to say.
"It will be a success, I declare it! I bless it! I promote it! I promise it!"
Okay, Lord, I am going to publish this post. I am going to do it with trepidation, because I don’t know what the reader may think, but just to prove that I am going to trust You, I will hit the publish button and write more for a later post. I hear You telling me to trust You, and so I shall. I will feel Your peace about me.
Dear Reader, I don’t know what you may be thinking. But in a little way, it doesn’t matter. That’s not to say that YOU don’t matter, because you do, but for me right now, I need to trust God and publish this. If you no longer come, thank you that you did for a while. If you do come back, thank you for that! I ask God to bless you and to answer your prayers, to help you to trust. In His name, Deirdre
Yesterday in church a friend came to me with a message from the Lord. She said that when I hugged her as I came in, she felt the Lord tell her to reassure me that things would be starting small, and I should not be worried about anything, He is in charge. He has a great thing for me, later. First I must learn how to deal with the small. I am thinking that this is about the inventory of books I have in my house and the angst I have about selling them in the next 2½ weeks. Eight months ago, my facilitator in my International School of Ministry class told me to not despise the day of small beginnings. God has told me that too.
This was a reminder of what He spoke to me on August 6, this year. "Your web page will be slow in getting started, but as word gets out more and more will come to it for a drink of comfort. It will be plain and simple, nothing fancy and intimidating. Just follow what I tell you to place out there. Each day, pray first.
"Deirdre, don't think you can do this without Me. It will fail if you try. I will tell you what to put there. It may only be a sentence, or just a scripture, or a long story. But I will tell you. Get the attitude that this is My web site and you are the steward. Just do your job - make sure that the information I give you goes out and then go about your business. Do not let this become an obsession for you.
"You are going to reach the people that no one else has been able to. When you pray for a laborer to reach those you love that are lost, I am sending someone there. Just the same, I am using you as a laborer to others. There are people praying for their friends and family, and their loved ones aren't listening to them. But you will reach them. I will inspire you and you will write what I want them to hear. I will direct their path to find your web site amongst the millions out there. You will help save people that you will only meet in Heaven.
"That's it, smile! Be of good cheer! There is a positive outcome. I am in you, and you are in Me, so we are one. We together will proclaim the good news! Smile! Rejoice! Let your heart sing! I love you, child! Do not worry, trust and obey. I will lead you to what I want you to say.
"It will be a success, I declare it! I bless it! I promote it! I promise it!"
Okay, Lord, I am going to publish this post. I am going to do it with trepidation, because I don’t know what the reader may think, but just to prove that I am going to trust You, I will hit the publish button and write more for a later post. I hear You telling me to trust You, and so I shall. I will feel Your peace about me.
Dear Reader, I don’t know what you may be thinking. But in a little way, it doesn’t matter. That’s not to say that YOU don’t matter, because you do, but for me right now, I need to trust God and publish this. If you no longer come, thank you that you did for a while. If you do come back, thank you for that! I ask God to bless you and to answer your prayers, to help you to trust. In His name, Deirdre
Saturday, December 3, 2011
Learning to Trust
I am supposed to write, that's what God has told me. That I am supposed to open my heart and let people know what He has done for me.
I don't know if you have any idea, dear Reader, how difficult this is for me. I fight a battle in my mind daily between ego and trust. I believe that I am at a turning point now, either do as my God has told me with reverent awe, or feel Him remove the anointing He has given me to write. I am not ashamed to say that this causes fear to rise in me. I know that the spirit of fear is not from God. 2 Timothy 1:7 (NKJV) tells us, "For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind." Yet I fall trap to the deception that I am not good enough, that people don't even read this blog. The enemy tells me that the proof is in the lack of comments, even when I ask for them because I think maybe I ought to just stop altogether. But the statistics of this web page tell me that there are people out there who read it in different countries in the world. There is no way of me finding out who sends a comment or who has stopped by this web page, but I know you are there.
I am ready to do as God has asked me, and that is to open my heart. God speaks with me. I can imagine how the media would play that out! "So, you think GOD spoke to you?!" They would be incredulous and full of ridicule. They would sarcastically mock me, as would anyone who has never stopped talking long enough to hear Him talk to them. Yes, God speaks with me! And guess what? He speaks to you! You don't believe me? Who do you think is behind that sweet voice of conscience telling you not to do something or not to go down that street because danger lurks there? What about when you just "feel" like doing something nice for someone? Maybe you let them pay for their groceries first, or you hold the door open for someone, or you put a dollar in the Salvation Army kettle and smile and say "have a nice day!"
That is the voice of God Himself. He is NOT too busy to visit with you in Russia, or you in the Netherlands, or Malaysia, or Latvia, or Germany, or here in the great USA! He is watching, He is waiting, He is loving us, and teaching us.
I began this message with the title of learning to trust. I will write a book about trust, I believe that God wants me to. He is teaching me about trust. Let me tell you, I am not the best of students. I am going to lay my soul bare to you over the coming days or weeks or months or however long it takes for me to do what He has asked. I will walk through my fear as Joyce Meyer suggests, and share with you things He has said to me, and things I have replied. I will try to let you know that we are very much alike, you and I. We share many things that will help each other move forward.
I will end this with a beginning. I will share with you the things that He spoke with me and what I have spoken with Him. I am beginning with a prayer for you and I.
My Dear Lord,
I come before You today somewhat afraid, and humbled by Your majesty. I am going to obey You and allow myself to be transparent to those You have selected to be a part of my life. I ask You to give me strength to go forward with what You have told me to do. I ask that You replace fear of ridicule and mockery with trust in You.
I know in my heart that You won't leave me, for You have told me so. The voices of the world shout so loud in my ear to not bare my soul, but Your still small voice beckons me to believe that You will accomplish great things through me, if I only allow You to. I believe that You will lead me in battle and that Jesus will fight for me! I believe that the victory is already ours, and that with every little skirmish I get through with Your help, the easier it will become for me to trust You.
I pray that sooner rather than later I grow into that woman You chose me to be. I surrender myself to You right now, witnessed by whoever may be reading this, to do my best to accomplish what You want me to, and to give the glory to You, Lord! It is only through You that what I write will be the answer to someone's prayer. Use me as Your pen, let my words be Yours, and let my heart become happier with each message we share. I collaborate with You, Lord, to write the words that will bring sight to the blind and heal the brokenhearted.
I love You more than I can put on this page, and I thank You for loving me and everyone reading these words. I thank You for every person that You have and will place in my life to bring You glory. I give You honor, Lord, and I thank You for saving my soul, and for choosing me for such a time as this. Amen.
Dear Reader, I will be back. Please bear with me as I obey and trust. Thank you for your kindness, and I ask God to bless each one of you in the name of the Holiest of holies.
I don't know if you have any idea, dear Reader, how difficult this is for me. I fight a battle in my mind daily between ego and trust. I believe that I am at a turning point now, either do as my God has told me with reverent awe, or feel Him remove the anointing He has given me to write. I am not ashamed to say that this causes fear to rise in me. I know that the spirit of fear is not from God. 2 Timothy 1:7 (NKJV) tells us, "For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind." Yet I fall trap to the deception that I am not good enough, that people don't even read this blog. The enemy tells me that the proof is in the lack of comments, even when I ask for them because I think maybe I ought to just stop altogether. But the statistics of this web page tell me that there are people out there who read it in different countries in the world. There is no way of me finding out who sends a comment or who has stopped by this web page, but I know you are there.
I am ready to do as God has asked me, and that is to open my heart. God speaks with me. I can imagine how the media would play that out! "So, you think GOD spoke to you?!" They would be incredulous and full of ridicule. They would sarcastically mock me, as would anyone who has never stopped talking long enough to hear Him talk to them. Yes, God speaks with me! And guess what? He speaks to you! You don't believe me? Who do you think is behind that sweet voice of conscience telling you not to do something or not to go down that street because danger lurks there? What about when you just "feel" like doing something nice for someone? Maybe you let them pay for their groceries first, or you hold the door open for someone, or you put a dollar in the Salvation Army kettle and smile and say "have a nice day!"
That is the voice of God Himself. He is NOT too busy to visit with you in Russia, or you in the Netherlands, or Malaysia, or Latvia, or Germany, or here in the great USA! He is watching, He is waiting, He is loving us, and teaching us.
I began this message with the title of learning to trust. I will write a book about trust, I believe that God wants me to. He is teaching me about trust. Let me tell you, I am not the best of students. I am going to lay my soul bare to you over the coming days or weeks or months or however long it takes for me to do what He has asked. I will walk through my fear as Joyce Meyer suggests, and share with you things He has said to me, and things I have replied. I will try to let you know that we are very much alike, you and I. We share many things that will help each other move forward.
I will end this with a beginning. I will share with you the things that He spoke with me and what I have spoken with Him. I am beginning with a prayer for you and I.
My Dear Lord,
I come before You today somewhat afraid, and humbled by Your majesty. I am going to obey You and allow myself to be transparent to those You have selected to be a part of my life. I ask You to give me strength to go forward with what You have told me to do. I ask that You replace fear of ridicule and mockery with trust in You.
I know in my heart that You won't leave me, for You have told me so. The voices of the world shout so loud in my ear to not bare my soul, but Your still small voice beckons me to believe that You will accomplish great things through me, if I only allow You to. I believe that You will lead me in battle and that Jesus will fight for me! I believe that the victory is already ours, and that with every little skirmish I get through with Your help, the easier it will become for me to trust You.
I pray that sooner rather than later I grow into that woman You chose me to be. I surrender myself to You right now, witnessed by whoever may be reading this, to do my best to accomplish what You want me to, and to give the glory to You, Lord! It is only through You that what I write will be the answer to someone's prayer. Use me as Your pen, let my words be Yours, and let my heart become happier with each message we share. I collaborate with You, Lord, to write the words that will bring sight to the blind and heal the brokenhearted.
I love You more than I can put on this page, and I thank You for loving me and everyone reading these words. I thank You for every person that You have and will place in my life to bring You glory. I give You honor, Lord, and I thank You for saving my soul, and for choosing me for such a time as this. Amen.
Dear Reader, I will be back. Please bear with me as I obey and trust. Thank you for your kindness, and I ask God to bless each one of you in the name of the Holiest of holies.
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